Cook Family Ministries
Respecting Your Spouse
Posted: 03 Feb 2013 06:31 AM PST
I have been married to my amazing wife for 11 years. My wife is an incredible woman of God that is more than I ever dreamed a wife could be. As I see her with our four children, and watch her pour herself unselfishly into her role as a mom and wife, I realize how truly blessed I am.
My wife is so much more than my spouse, but she is really my best friend. I don’t say that as a cliche, but mean it with all my heart. When I am not working, we are together and gladly so. That is how it has always been and I pray it never changes. I thank God for the opportunity to share my life with such an incredible woman.
Proverbs 18:22 “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord.”
Now, as wonderful as my wife is, I still find myself at times completely confounded by the female species. My wife and I can both look at the same situation and see two completely different things. Naturally, this causes some friction at times. It would be so much easier if she would learn the phrase, “Honey, you are always right and I will agree with whatever you think is best.” Let me tell you, that is never going to happen. EVER.
While I have discovered that my wife has the audacity to disagree with me, I have also learned to respect and honor my wife, even in the midst of disagreements. I can as be mad as a hornet, but my anger is never an excuse to disrespect my wife by speaking ill of her, or venting to others about her.
When I speak about my wife to anyone, I praise her for how amazing she is. Even if I am frustrated at her over something, my words about her do not change. I refuse to speak curses over the woman that God has so incredibly blessed me with.
It saddens me to hear some of my coworkers talk about their spouse. I hear phrases like, “I couldn’t wait to get to work to get away from my husband/wife.” How sad is that? If the spouses of these people heard those words, it would cause so much pain and hurt in their lives and marriages.
Even if your spouse never finds out about it, there is damage being done that you cannot see with your eyes. Speaking negative words about your spouse is like burying seeds of bitterness in your heart, and then adding Miracle Grow to it.
Divorce does not happen overnight, but is a process that occurs over time. Love for a spouse is not lost, but instead is overwhelmed by the resentment, bitterness, anger and hurt that people allow their minds and hearts to focus on. This occurs over days, weeks, months and years. The process starts as a simple thought and is watered and nurtured by our words and actions.
Why go there? Whether it be to your family, kids, friends, or coworkers, it is never OK to let negative words come out of your mouth about your spouse. If you have an issue that is bother you, the best thing you can do is take that issue to the only person who can really do anything about it, and that is God. God can do more with one prayer than you can do by sharing your anger with everyone you know.
Colossions 3:19 “Husbands, love your wives [be affectionate and sympathetic with them] and do not be harsh or bitter or resentful toward them